Funny definitions

Funny definitions by bad-apple 2009/03/05 06:36
CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!

LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either

MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

DIVORCE:
Future Tense of Marriage

COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece

TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power

DICTIONARY:
A place where divorce comes before marriage

CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present

teehem 2009/12/29 22:00
KISSING:
commercial activity involving the transaction of much saliva.

teehem 2009/12/29 22:10
Invaluable:
not valuable
marriage:
glorified prison.

Samb 2009/12/31 06:34

Lafaya: Shortest and best definition of a lawyer is liar.. Once i had 2 b present at the court as a witness of a case, wen the magistrate arived he asked the person in the accused box: do you have a lawyer. N that person exclaimed: yes your honour he is an expert in lying.. /smiley

Samb 2009/12/31 06:42

aloysis: I like cigaret

means u r a fool according to bad apple's definition

Samb 2009/12/31 06:47

bad-apple: If you have got more definitions like these,plz post them here /smiley

enjoy folks !!!

ha ha ha ha ha ha . . . . /smiley

Samb 2009/12/31 06:49

bad-apple: DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip

OPPORTUNIST:
A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river

OPTIMIST:
A person who while falling from EIFFEL TOWER says in midway "SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

PESSIMIST:
A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in OPPORTUNITY

MISER:
A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH!

POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence Later

FATHER:
A banker provided by nature

CRIMINAL:
A guy no different from the other, unless he gets caught

BOSS:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early

DOCTOR:
A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you.

hahahahaha /smiley

-hehd-