Teacher To Alok Nath : -
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Wo Kya Hai Jo COW K Paas Chaar
Aur Mere pas Do Hai ??
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Alok Nath :- " MADAM LEGS,
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MAM :- " Wo Kya Hai Jo Tumhare
PANT Me Hai Aur Mere PATICOAT
Me Nahi..
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Alok Nath :- " POCKET
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MAM :- " Wo Kya Hai Jo Din Me Lene
K Bajay RAAT Ko BISTAR Par Lete
Hai,
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Alok Nath :- " NEEND
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MAM :- " Wo Kya Hai Jo LADKI 1st
Time Karwane Par Jor Se Chillati Hai,
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Alok Nath :- " KAAN Me CHHED,
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MAM :- " Wo Kya Hai Jiske AAdha
Jane Par DARD Hota Hai Par Pura
Jane Par Accha Lagta Hai,
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Alok Nath :- " HATHO Me KANGAN
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MAM :- " Wo Kya Hai Jiske Paas Ho
to HAATH Me Pakad Kar Hilata Hai,
Aur
Jiske Paas Na Ho To UNGLI Daal K
Hilata Hai,
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Alok Nath :- "TOOTH BRUSH"
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Ye Hote Hai Sanskaar....

Alok Nath ne ek baar IIT ka exam diya.
Now that exam is called IIT JEE


Q. What would Alok Nath say in a Thumbs Up ad?
A. Aaj kuch sanskari kartein hain.


Alok Nath removed his slippers before he plays Temple Run.


Alok Nath sends Samdhan requests instead of Friend requests.

Example of self insult :-
Girl (in angry mood) :-
tumne kabhi ullu dekha hai kya ??
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Boy (nazre jhuka ke) :- nahi
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Girl :- neeche kya dekh rahe ho .. upar meri taraf dekho

Police: Jis car ne thoka, uska color and No. yad h?
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Santa: Wo to yad nhi hai, lekin chalane wali
Madam k kurti k 2 buttn khule the,ye pakka yad hai..!

Uday Chopra is dating Nargis Fakhri.
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Moral : There is a girl made for everyone,
except jobless Engineers.

WIFE: What would you do if i died? Would you get married again?
Husband: No…
Wife- Why not? Don’t you like being married?
Husband: Of course i do.
Wife: Then why wouldn’t you remarry?
Husband: Ok, ok, i’d get married again…
Wife: Would you live in our house with your new Wife…?
Husband: Yes, it’s a great house.
Wife: Would you let her drive my car ?
Husband: Yes, its almost new, dear .
Wife: Would you give her my jewelry?
Husband: No.. I am sure she would want her own..
Wife: Would she wear my shoes..?
Husband: No, her size is ’5′
Wife: –silence-
Husband: ‘shiiit’…!!!

Govt-Jiske 5 Bache he use Ghar Degi..
Sardar k 3 the,
usne wife se kaha-
padosan k 2 b mere hai unko lata hu..
( Lane k bad) Apne 3 kaha gaye?
WIFE- Jinke the wo le gaye...!

If Yesterday's Jeans
Still Have The Belt In Them.,,
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They Instantly Become Today's Jeans...

Strange But True Fact...
"Whenever I Give
A lot Of Importance To Someone
In
My Life..,
I Lost My Importance In Their
Life..!!!

Aaj dosti se bharosa uth gya mera..
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Aaj apne hi dost ne class me kh diya..
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Padhne de yarrrrr...

Mild Non-Veg:
Dudhwala Ringing Door Bell.
Lady from Inside:
Bhaiya kitna Dabaoge,
Ab bas bhi karo.
Tumse accha To Paperwalahai;
Chupchap Neeche se Daal Deta hai.
Most confusing double meaning joke..
:
Girl: aaj office jate hi boss mujpe chad gaya!
Friend : Q???
Girl: Main "late gayi" thi..
1st frnd to 2 Friend'
"Lay mithai kha!"
2nd Friend: Kis baat ki?
1st frnd:
Teri Bhabhi call centre me job karti hai,
aur usko Best "CALL GIRL" ka Award mila hay!
DHABE Pe PATI Ne 1 BANANA SHAKE
& PATNI Ne 2 mosambi juice Piye.
Counter Pe Payment K Time
WAITER Ne AAWAZ Di:
BHAIYA Ka 1 KELA
Aur BHABHI Ka 2 Mosambi Kaat lena.
-
Maine galti se meri Bhabhi ki iPill kha li,
kya kru?
Dr: Bindaas ghoomo
Dosto ko khush karo,
72 ghanto k liye
Prepaid ho gayi ho .....
Jaa simran Jaa..
Jee le apni zindagi...

Teacher: Explain About Terrorist..?
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Pappu: Terrorist Is A Tourist,
Who Comes From Other Country
To Celebrate Diwali In Our Country...

Great yaar.

" Take a plate and throw it on the
ground.
-Okay, done.
Did It Break?
-Yes
Now say sorry to it.
-Sorry.
Did it go back to the way it was
before?
-No.
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Do you understand the
Silent Message by my this post .. Stop hurting !

That awkward moment,
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When you see,
9 year olds in a relationship, while you're still single..

Lips -Start of sex.
Nipples -Bite of Sex.
Boobs ..-Shape of sex.
Penis ..-Length .. of sex.
Pusy ..-Depth of sex.
Ass -Back door .. entry of sex.
Nudity-Invitation of sex.
F%*k-Xperience of sex.
Suck-Taste of sex.
Masturbation -Substitute of sex.
Condom- Safety of sex.
Sperm - Cream of sex.
Ejaculation ..- End of sex.
Prostitute - Machine of sex.
Marriage ..- License .. of sex.
Periods- Having Rest from sex.
Pregnancy- Proof of sex.
Child ..- Result of Sex.
HAVE A SEXY Winter

Best Slogans.....
1. Sign on a railway station at Patna:
(Aana free, jaana free, pakde gaye
to khaana free).
2. Sign on a famous beauty parlor
in Mumbai:
(Don't whistle at the girl going out
from here. She may be your
grandmother).
3. Sign on a bulletin board:
(Success is relative,More the
success, more the relatives).
4. Sign at a barber's saloon in Juhu,
Mumbai:
(We need your heads to run our
business).
5. A traffic slogan:
(Don't let your kids drive if they are
not old enough or else they never
will be old).
6. THE BEST ONE BY INDIAN ARMED
FORCES:
(Its God's responsibility to forgive
the terrorist organizations. It's our
responsibility to arrange the
meeting between them & God .

Sada joke

Agar tum 90 bar paap karoge to
45 bar pakde jaoge.
why...
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
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?
?
bcoz sin 90 = cot 45...!!

Kya January.. Kya February..
Hum
Kya kare November Ko,
December Ko ?!
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Jab Gf Hi Nai Humari To..
Aag Lage
Is Calendar Ko..